Social networks have become part of our life and require more and more serious treatment. Someone gets fired for posting on Facebook, and another was denied a promising position because of a cheeky tweet. For a thoughtless phrase, carelessly published in a social network, you can really sit down.

However, we are adults. We can and must be held accountable for our actions. What about kids? Is it worth involving them on the social web before they can decide for themselves whether to be in this digital world or not?

We invite you to think about the reasoning of Kim Shendrow - a person who has personally faced the consequences of a careless attitude towards social networks.

Some will say that I am a bad mother. Every day I share the life and work of my children with hundreds of strangers. There are 1549 people on my list of “friends”, most of whom I have never spoken to or even seen. These so-called "friends" could tell you what my children eat, how they are doing at school, what they love and hate.

Before my kids grew up and learned to articulate their resentment about my actions in the past, capturing moments of life on Facebook seemed like something good. Now, as children get older, their anger and resentment grows stronger. It's just creepy to me. Everything goes to the fact that sooner or later I still have to delete my account.

Every time I post another photo with my children, where they are jumping into the pool or sleeping curled up on the couch, I violate the inviolability of their privacy, and Facebook (and subsequently the entire Internet) will not forget this. Will never forget.

However, there are more general reasons why you should delete your social media accounts. Consider this list:

1. Facebook makes you think your life sucks

People post only positive moments of their lives on social media. Failures and disappointments remain behind the scenes. As a result, looking at your friends' feed, you may get the impression that their lives are entirely made up of only successes, joy and accomplishments, and yours is not. This is a dangerous illusion.

2. Mom won't let me talk to strangers

But Facebook's friend search algorithm thinks the other way around. He wants strangers to be your friends. The more, the better. Every day the social network tries to slip me people who are “friends of my friends”. This stream is diluted by people from my past - those many of whom I would like to forget. It also contains my cousin, who passed away 2 years ago.

3. Your boss reads you

These are the times when posting on Facebook could end up losing your current job and losing your chance to get jobs in many promising places in the future. In Foxboro, USA, a man was fired for posting a photo with a swastika painted on the body of a drunk friend. There, teachers are fired for taking pictures of them drinking alcohol. One venerable female teacher was fired for refusing to remove current students from her friendships. Even if you shield your posts from specific personalities, your foe can whisper your messages and photos to your boss.

4. Your Facebook “friends” don't give a damn about your little joys and events

Seriously, there are hardly many individuals on your friend list who were really curious to know that your kitten is finally litter-trained. You need to be able to filter things based on reasons for being published. Dads, moms, stop posting photos and events with kids when there are awkward moments. In the future, this can be used for ridicule and mockery of your children.

5. You will stop messing around at work

Well, or at least you will spend a little less time on idleness. It's no secret that Facebook is a great time waster. In the United States, such gatherings on social networks during working hours result in $ 28 billion in losses to employers annually.

6. The consequences of your revelations

There is such a mood when you want to admit some mistake or failure. And you write about it on Facebook. And this is read by friends, acquaintances, neighbors, colleagues. And they remember this at a personal meeting. And you will see it in their eyes, and maybe you will hear it behind your back. What makes people deliberately belittle the qualities of their personality in the eyes of others?

Everything written here within Facebook is applicable to any other social service. With a sufficient level of insanity, the social network may well spoil life. What do you think makes people behave this way in a digital environment? What reasons made you abandon social networks or reconsider the format of interaction with them?

The social network Vkontakte has become a real sensation on the territory of the Russian-speaking Internet. At first, it was simply used for communication between people (not necessarily at a great distance), but then it acquired a lot of other meanings. Why, then, are people interested in how to delete a page permanently in a contact?

As a rule, they themselves explain their actions by the fact that they decided to live without social networks. However, in reality, everything is far from so simple. First, there is nothing inherently wrong with such resources, but “it's all about the doses”. If a social network becomes a real addiction, then a person may decide to abandon it. The problem is that you don't need to delete the page at all for this.

If someone really gives up on social networks, then he simply stops using them. Deleting it will not help anything - the page is easy to return, and even if it has disappeared forever, you can easily create a new one. So why do people want to delete a VK page? To do this, you need to find out what this resource is.

What is Vkontakte?

At first, everything was far from being too rosy. The networks needed to be promoted, and for this they even held contests among promoters. The most active were given gifts from Apple. However, after about a year, the audience had grown to three million. From that time on, the long path of the social network began, which has not stopped until now.

Vkontakte has become a place where people upload their photos to be seen by numerous friends. They posted videos, actively discussing them with everyone. Users made notes on the walls, talking about their own lives and thoughts.

The resource gave a lot of room for creativity. People began to create groups where they posted their own drawings or poems, various videos, such as blogs and stream recordings. Many began to make money with the help of a social network, others use it as a means of advertising and promotion. Be that as it may, the site's capabilities are really wide.

Why do some people want to delete the page?

What is the average page on a social network? First of all, this is the owner's name and surname (often fictitious), as well as an avatar (very often a simple picture from the Internet). Secondly, it is a variety of personal information that can be displayed in columns such as "date of birth", "hometown", "worldview" and "about myself."

Finally, there is a wall on the page, originally used for communication, but today more and more for advertising and distributing anything. In addition, there are sections with video and music, which are filled in according to the personal taste of the owner.

So, what can be the reason for deleting a VKontakte page? As mentioned above, many will say that this is a desire to get rid of addiction, but, as a rule, this is just an excuse.

In fact, 95% of removal cases have only one single purpose - to attract attention. And, as a rule, the attention of one particular person. Yes, the pages are mostly deleted by young people, while the rest simply abandon social networks.

Nevertheless, there remains one more case in which the question of how to permanently delete a page in a contact is quite logical and normal. This is a situation in which a person creates a new account for himself. As a rule, this happens due to hacking of the previous one, or if you want to start everything from scratch, while not offending old friends by removing them from the list.

How to permanently delete your page on Vkontakte?

Before the design change that took place in mid-2016, it was possible to delete the VK page without instructions, at an intuitive level. To do this, just go to the settings, and there it already becomes clear what to click on. Today, problems arise at an earlier stage.

The redesign hid the settings in such a way that finding them is now quite difficult. The required icon is located at the top, on the right - there is the name of the page owner and a mini-version of the avatar. After clicking on this, a small list will open in which you need to select "Settings".

How the page is deleted:

• After clicking on "Settings", a new window will open.
• By default, it shows the "General" column - this is what you need.
• At the very bottom of this column is the inscription "You can delete your page."
• Clicking on it will cause a pop-up window to appear. In it, the site will ask you to indicate the reason why the owner decided to delete.
• After that, all that remains is to click on the "Delete page" button.

Upon completion of these actions, the account will be replaced by an image of the dog's face on a gray background. Next to it, it will be indicated that you can restore the page before the expiration of six months. As a rule, no one waits for the end of this line, but returns the account to normal in about a couple of days, and sometimes a couple of hours or minutes. At least this applies to those cases where a person "decides to abandon social networks", attracting attention.

Removing an old, no longer needed page

It is worth considering separately the question of how to permanently delete a page in a contact if it is duplicate and therefore no longer needed. Sure use the previous instructions and wait six months, but, as a rule, the owner eventually loses all access to his old account.

• Previously, pages were linked to an email address rather than a phone number. It is very easy to forget your password and the answer to the security question from your mail.
• The inability to get to your e-mail makes it impossible to recover the password from the social network. As a result, the page remains inaccessible.

Fortunately, there is a way to fix this problem. As a rule, it works completely if the correct first and last name is indicated on the old page. If this is not the case, then the situation will be different in each case.

You can permanently delete the old page as follows:

• Using your new account, you need to apply to the support service.
• This is done through the "Help" item located in the same place as the settings.
• Having opened the list of questions, you can scroll through it to the very bottom, click on the absence of the required question and apply to the support service.
• It will need to describe the situation with the deletion of the page.

As a rule, for a successful completion, you will need to send a photo, which simultaneously shows the owner's face, his account and the spread of the passport. Other situations are also possible, as it always happens individually.

In case of successful identification of the person, at the request of the owner, his old page will be permanently deleted within a few days. Thus, it will be possible to fully focus on the new account.

Friends, I greet everyone! Today I would like to touch upon the topic of how to delete a VKontakte page, I know perfectly well that there are a lot of articles and video reviews on deleting pages on the Internet, but I would like to write a little extensively on this topic, describe to you all what and why people delete their pages. By the way, I want to note that the first competition on the blog starts sooner, which I will write later, so it is better to subscribe to the blog update and wait for the next articles.

We are all different: someone, leaving, shouts "Goodbye", someone calmly says "Goodbye", there are those who do not define their departure at all - they do not say goodbye and quietly closes the door. So in the social network: one deleted page in contact with "loud" statuses and "important" statements, while the other is imperceptible and quiet. These two sides have one thing in common: they were all interested in the question of how to get rid of an annoying or already unnecessary profile.

Delete a page in contact forever - the "usual" way

Go to your profile on the social network. Find the tab “ Settings". At the very bottom there will be a postscript " You can delete your page". Follow the specified link (here it is http://vkontakte.ru/settings?act=deactivate), select the reason for deleting the profile, click on the blue button. That's it, you are no longer a user of the social network VKontakte. But this is only indirectly. In fact, within seven months, with a slight movement of the mouse, you can restore the profile from oblivion with all the photos, videos, etc.

You can also delete a "lost" page from the Web - one that you cannot access for any reason (forgotten password, hacked profile). First you have to. To do this, follow the link http://vk.com/restore... Don't remember your details? That way http://vk.com/restore?act=return_page... The decision to restore the profile will be positive if your data remains on the page. The support service will offer you to send a copy of the documents with a photo by which they identify you.

If you do not remember your password, email, phone and you still do not have a passport, contact the support service at the link http://vk.com/support?act=new- you can do this only from the registered account of a friend or relative.

What happens to the data after deleted page in contact

When you click on the " delete page", It is not actually deleted. At any time you can return your profile to its place - with all uploaded files (photos, videos, music), with all personal information. If you want personal data to be permanently deleted from the service, you will need “ an application with a live signature and passport data (with the address of registration and residence), sent by mail"- and not by e-mail, but by live mail from Ukraine or Russia, - this is how VK agents respond to users.

There is a horror story on the Internet that, they say, all the data that was once uploaded to a profile will forever remain on the Web. And that someday (even after 10-20 years) some "bad person" will certainly take advantage of the naivety of the once "young user" and expose obscene (seemingly remote) information for all to see. Whether this is so - no one knows for sure. All existing "arguments" are not supported by facts, and at the same time are not refuted.

How to delete a page in contact forever - a "difficult" option

After reading the information above, you probably have a question: how will you get rid of your profile on the social network once and for all? There is one more method, which we called "difficult" due to the abundance of points:

1. Erase all personal information.
2. Get rid of all your friends.
3. Delete records, photos and videos, music.
4. In the settings for the profile, close access to your data to the maximum.
5. Change mail (for existing, but not used).
6. Disable all notifications coming to your mobile phone using the link http://vk.com/deact.php.

But! Even after you get rid of the VKontakte profile using the "difficult" option, you can still "uncheck" the box and start filling in the personal account data again.

How to permanently delete a page in contact - the "complaint" method

Many netizens who have lost access to their profiles ask to report them. Recall: 100 complaints to the VKontakte administration are equal to blocking an account without the possibility of recovery. But! If you have always been a good boy or good girl - you didn’t spam, didn’t post sharply negative information on the wall - it will not be easy to delete a page with a forgotten password using a “complaint” method. Regular peaceful profiles are not banned by anyone. So in this case, only contacting support will help you.

1. Spam in popular groups.
2. Swear at "bad" words on the pages of famous people, even the same Pavel Durov.

That is, to behave inappropriately - to be rude, troll, sell some nonsense, act like a fool, beg, etc. The more negative your profile is, the more complaints there will be, which means that the more likely you will be banned soon.

You have deleted a page in contact: Are you sure about this?

If you decide to part with your profile forever, know:

1. Your entries, comments, likes, messages will remain, even if you are no longer on VKontakte!
2. All these records, likes will still be signed with your name. That is, your profile will no longer exist, but your thoughts, actions, interests will remain online forever.

How can I avoid this? Before deleting your account, try changing the last name and first name to a fake one - not existing in nature, but organic in sound.

Who and why deleted the page in contact

According to the official statistics published on the VKontakte blog, you can see that more than 50% of the social network members have not deleted and do not want to delete their profile. About 30% have blocked or are about to block their account without further recovery. About 19% answered that they would delete / delete their page, but they will definitely restore it sooner or later. Note that this survey is anonymous, that is, there was no need for users to “embellish” their own opinion.

And now the most interesting thing: TOP reasons " Why people get rid of their pages in contact».

In fifth place in popularity: "Fear of the audience" or "I want to hide." Some users suddenly realize that their personal data is available not only to friends, but also to enemies. The constant concern about hiding information prompts the desire to delete the page.

In fourth place: "The FSB is keeping us at gunpoint." “VKontakte is a 'spy' tool. Users unknowingly post all the information about themselves, by which it is easy to calculate them later, "- this opinion is very common among 11-13 adolescents who" have something to hide "(sarcasm, if that).

In third place: "VKontakte is not comme il faut." “It is much more fashionable to sit on Facebook or Instagram,” some say, clicking on the button “ Delete page».

In second place: "Contact addiction". Addiction and addiction cause withdrawal symptoms. A social network user cannot live without "likes" and "comments". He sits in his profile all the time - at work, at home, on the way home, etc. And someone decides to end this once and forever and ever–they delete the page in contact.

In the first place: “I'm tired, I'll restore it later”, “What will happen if my profile disappears - how many people will remember me?”, “Let everyone know that I feel bad, that I have problems - I delete the page so that later restore again. " All these reasons are just a way to attract attention to yourself (or your problem). Such people really need communication, but only in reality.

Happy viewing:)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_uo7QaYga7A

Today social networks are an endless source of information: about the past, about the present, about the future. Photos, statuses, tweets, likes and tags on photos. You can remain unnoticed and at the same time closely follow the life of the people you are interested in.

Vkontakte and its online colleagues make a significant contribution to relationships. But sometimes the relationship ends, and Vkontakte and Facebook continue to work.

So to leave or not to leave friends with an ex or an ex? The verdict, in my opinion, is unambiguous - if this question bothers you, then of course, No.

For those who doubt why, let's see what the consequences might be. From a psychological point of view.

Why would you want to leave them at all?

Did you know that about 70% of young men and women surveyed in one study 1 continue to covertly monitor the status and likes of their ex? About 70%! It's not even half. And you may never know that you are being followed.

People monitor the profiles of their ex for a variety of reasons: anxiety, jealousy, envy, depression, anger, melancholy and other negative emotions force to open again and again His or Her page.

Many hope for the restoration of relations and may, because of this, see in the statuses and tweets a certain hidden meaning, a secret message.

Even if the profile is private, and its owner (or hostess) does not share anything particularly intimate, a profile picture and a list of friends, for example, can already tell a lot. Some social networks allow you to see when a person was last online.

Half of those surveyed in the same study reported trying to find photos of a former partner paired with a new person on social media, or other evidence that they were starting a new relationship. At the same time, those who are engaged in such surveillance of the ex are convinced that this is a completely innocent and harmless occupation 2.

But in fact, is it really that harmless?

Consequences of surveillance: only negative

Globally, the more time you spend constantly spying on your ex, the less likely you are to quickly recover from your breakup and start a normal new relationship. Regardless of whether you left a friend or not, the very fact of regular monitoring of his statuses, photos and posts is important.

👉 You are more likely to experience jealousy, anger, possessiveness, and stress. At some point, you may find out that your ex / ex has really started a new relationship and he seems to like it a lot! Then your experiences will become very strong.

👉 You spend less time on your urgent problems here-and-now, which require your attention.

👉 You are less involved in new relationships, which means that the likelihood of success is reduced.

👉 You continue to spend your strength, energy and resources on your ex and his life. You can imagine it this way: you are still investing your last money in a bank that will collapse and you will not receive interest or your funds will not be returned.

👉 Your new partner may notice that you still have not dotted the i's: you comment, write poisonous statuses, visit your ex's profile, etc. Do you think this will benefit your new relationship or not?

👉 When you communicate with ex live, it is unpleasant, you feel strong negative emotions, but you have feedback, you get at least some information and answers to your questions. By following them on social networks, you have none of this. You speculate and remain one-on-one with your experiences. It is clear that there is nothing useful in this in the long run.

👉 This behavior can easily become obsessive. The day may come when you cross the border of “just innocent surveillance” (although we can already see that it is not so innocent), and then it will be difficult for you to get rid of addiction and anxiety.

The only possible plus from spying on ex- this is the likelihood that he or she at some point may publish something like that, too stupid or mundane, which will once again confirm for you the correctness of the decision to break up. But how long can this be expected?

What to do next?

So, the conclusion: it does not matter whether you formally remained on the lists of friends or not, constant monitoring of the activity of your ex (or ex) in social networks is what is important.

This can already negatively affect how quickly you recover and can move forward, how bad you will feel in the process of adapting to new conditions.

Some of us can stop following on social networks in only one way - to remove from friends. So do it right now: remove from your friends on Facebook, on Odnoklassniki, in My World, on Twitter, on Instagram, in a word, everywhere.

• Remove all marks on photos and tags (markers).
• Delete all shared photos from your phone and laptop (if this idea makes you very anxious, or you are used to keeping everything in archives, then transfer the photos somewhere so that they cannot easily catch your eye).
• Delete songs and playlists that remind you of this person.
• Block or delete the ex from messengers, Whatsapp, Viber, etc.
• Remove this person's contact from your address book, delete all of his (her) emails.
• Tune in to the fact that you will gradually, but surely, cleanse yourself of past relationships.

Of course, there is no guarantee that you will immediately feel better, but there is a guarantee that you will have a little more time :) And you will remain free for your own health and future.

1 Lyndon, A., Bonds-Raacke, J., & Cratty, A. D. (2011). College students ’Facebook stalking of ex-partners. Cyberpsychology, Behavior, and Social Networking, Online First, DOI: 10.1089 / cyber.2010.0588.
2 Bowe G. Reading romance: the impact Facebook rituals can have on a romantic relationship. Journal of Comparative Research in Anthropology and Sociology 2010; 1: 61-77.
3 Marshal, T. (2012). Facebook surveillance of former romantic partners: Associations with postbreakup recovery and personal growth. Cyberpsychology, Behavior, and Social Networking, 15, 1-6

Show comments

18 comments

I deleted my ex 6 years ago, and I have no regrets. I have not forgotten her, and did not stop loving her - I just stopped thinking about her. From 90% of all my thoughts only about her gradually became 0.01%. It really didn't help me find another one. Now I'm not sure at all that I need someone. Accustomed to being alone. The proximity is now annoying.

1. Having lived for 15 years together, and when I heard that a friend was coming to live with no where to live, so I had to move out, in fact my friend turned out to be a friend, after this, only one thing: “Rub the bitches that are sitting on you! ", Offensively for something else, it is difficult to resurrect trust in new people, cynicism prevails (...

   You, of course, dear girls, excuse me, but I absolutely agree with this article. If it is necessary to draw conclusions, do it, but do them for yourself, without the participation of another person in them, since you can only answer for your condition, which, in fact, is the only and important point in your life. And all this surveillance is masochism, even if you have at least 5 children in common, this does not justify the surveillance. It is necessary to be here and now at such moments and to recover as soon as possible, and only then, when the guns are bombed, carry out analysis and draw conclusions so as not to face this in the future.

   There is only one conclusion - DO NOT FOLLOW. PROHIBITED, IN NO EVENT. All the most important is solved through a conversation, where you can hear live speech and get some kind of feedback.

   And how to explain that you visited the page first when it was sad and bad, and then became much more often? And I understand that it is not necessary, that’s all, there’s no turning back, but I still want to go in and look at him suddenly as badly as me

   I agree with the comment Everything is individual. You rely solely on statistics, and what it actually reflects. It reflects the state of society, and in it, relationships are less and less built on feelings, in a deep understanding), now there is more pragmatism, selfishness, pride, self-affirmation and other things from the material. Divorce statistics are proof of this. Society is increasingly moving away from the spiritual, mental to the material, pragmatic. I do not presume to condemn or justify - it's just a fact. And I agree, if there was no love initially, then your recipe has the right to life. And what to do if it was, and even more so it remains, and what to do if one of the two made mistakes. You propose to break the connection without even understanding what is the cause of the mistakes, and that the mistakes do not need to be corrected. I always tell my children, if you see mistakes, correct them. There is no fault of mistakes, there is fault of not correcting them. But now, the young people broke up, you conclude that there can be no relationship. But maybe, are there not cases when people did not meet for years, and then built families, figuring out what was happening to them, understanding their true feelings. You are suggesting - to tear up and not come back. Of course, it's easier this way, why dig into yourself, in him (her), go on looking for another (other). I am now watching my children after parting, and not because of the appearance of another (another) in their life, but just something went wrong. They have not deleted each other, moreover, they like, and comment, and periodically correspond. At the same time, they try to look towards other potentials, compare, delve into mistakes. So is it bad, no - it's difficult, sometimes painful, but I'm sure it's very useful. You propose not just to break off relations, you deliberately give people the thought "I am not guilty (guilty), which means - forget, throw out and look for that (that)", but what about the analysis, why they got together, how they lived, why they parted, what errors. After all, if this is not understood, how can you be sure that the next feelings will not tolerate the same. And this can be understood through the continuation of relations, through the virtualization of the latter. For example, she (he) said (la) all the time, I love, and after a month she is already building relationships with another (other), so it was love, or what, how he (she) will understand this, if she continues to love and hope for her (him) , only through observing him (her), looking for a refutation or proof of the truth of feelings. And imagine, young people, due to their inexperience in building a family, made mistakes, dug in them and fled, making erroneous conclusions about their relationships and feelings. And there are two options for development: yours - to break completely and look for a new life, and the second (let's consider mine), observing the behavior of each other, analyze the relationship further. alone, or maybe through social networking opportunities and together, suddenly find out that there are feelings now, and the mistakes that have occurred must be corrected by restoring contacts, first virtually, and then real. Yes, there is a possibility of one-sided feelings, one really loved, the other, as it turned out, did not. But here, too, one cannot do without continued relationships in social networks, such a fact must be established - yes, I love, oh he (she) no - it is proved, a fact. What to do with this then, first of all, to understand myself, why I love and did not see a reciprocal feeling and continued to build relationships. How not to get into such a situation in the future, how to figure out what to pay attention to, etc. questions will appear only after analyzing what happened, but only after establishing the fact of his (her) love. And if you delete from all your (your) half, how to find out if they fled correctly. You propose an answer for the ease of life, but it’s easier, but will it be easier later, when everything will be repeated again. How true do you think the phrases "All men are goats" or "All women ..." But everyone knows that both are to blame for the breakup, which means that without understanding YOUR guilt there will be no future, but you can understand by continuing the virtual line of relations, as you say, spying on the life of the former. Even when there was a real betrayal, you still need to understand the reasons for YOUR behavior, which led to the betrayal. Either you initially see (don't see) the reveler, but build a pink relationship with him, then what do you expect from them, or you create such a situation that the other (other) is looking for other feelings and relationships with another person. In either case, there is the fault of the one who was cheated on, shouldn't you understand and make sure for the future.
   I’m sure it’s good for you to continue to scan your ex, or maybe both. There are examples, believe me.

2. It’s good when you don’t have time to have children. Although it is also difficult and painful, it can be thrown out of the phone, from all contacts ... But what if the ex communicates with the child? The child is small, communication only through my mother's phone, voice and video through the same WhatsApp. You cannot delete ... And when the baby is taken to visit dad, grandparents, and then the pictures are posted on the networks ...

3. It is very difficult. Take it and cross it out right away. I have been "sick" for a year now, because for 10 years you can say they ate from the same plate. But. Fell in love with another. Cheated. Me. Her. Betrayed. Insulted. Of course, I'm not an angel either. She also staged a show on emotions. Then I was ill for a long time. I lost 12 kg in a month. VVD attacks began. Taking medications. Neurology. Inpatient treatment. His drunken calls. Then these entries in the emergency situations list each other. Conflict with his new passion. By the way, she called me herself and let's make a claim. Laugh at me. Tell me nasty things. I called from his phone. I had to defend myself briefly. Hard. She put both in place. And the enmity began. Cold war on the social network. She placed all sorts of posts on the wall for herself trying to hurt me. Sometimes she succeeded. I don’t know why I didn’t cross it all then. She probably wanted to play herself. But recently I stopped reacting altogether. Closed. It was activated based only on the business that I do. Just this. No snot. And suddenly I see. Out of curiosity, I looked at the rival's page. That somehow she is not as happy as before. That immeasurable love was reflected. Now, no. Absolutely stupid and empty posts. And now I don't care. He chose a position to be silent. I reluctantly with pain in my soul and heart do my best to completely forget him. It's still hard. But I have to endure. Remembering all the bad moments of his relationship to me. I mentally wished her to experience ten times worse from him. And so. Hopefully, in the new 2017, I will completely get rid of someone who was once close and beloved to me. Rather, from thinking about him.

4. An interesting article, but I think that everything is individual. For example, I quarreled with my best friend, we did not talk for a long time, I was worried and wound myself up. I even called him several times ... ..but he didn’t pick up the phone .... I waited ... and waited ... worried and waited ... ... and then I woke up in the morning and deleted him from my friends, in the evening he came to visit and asked why I deleted him ?))) Now our friendship is even stronger)))

5. That's right, but it is very difficult to remove an ex from all contacts, especially if something connects you with him, for example, a joint child. Relationships in the past are a passed stage of life. It cannot be erased from memory (although I really want to). After the divorce, I immediately pulled photos of my ex-husband from the album, deleted everything on the phone that was connected with him, got rid of his things and even a gold wedding ring. But blocking a person on social media is difficult. Purely out of interest. I deleted and restored several times. And to be honest, it's easier to forget everything and not stir up the past. But we have to communicate, although the former spouse has moved to another country.

By myself, I am a kind person, and I do not wish any harm to anyone, I met a good guy on the Internet, it seems like we liked a friend, we talk for a long time, he admitted that he fell in love with me, but I also have feelings for him, but he is very rarely online , and I began to forget about him, you still need to live a real life, a friend introduced me to one guy, talked about two days after he called for a walk, just walked as friends, after a walk he offered to meet, I agreed, I don’t feel great feelings, but when I wrote the one who by correspondence, I did not lie, told everything, he used to tell me that he was looking for a girl who would not go to another, I did not even expect from myself, I completely forgot about him, and I want to return everything back, but if I return it then again I will be alone, no one will hug me, no one will press me to my heart, will not say tender words, it hurts, I hate myself, I’m a terrible person, I betrayed him, I don’t know what to do, today he said that everything loves me exactly, and deleted his page, and m I had a thought about Suicide, they certainly were before, but not so strong, today I decided that if he does not restore the page until next Thursday, I will die, I don’t know whom to choose, there is no way out, but I’ve already made a decision about death
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Vita, age: 15/01/2014

Feedback:

Dear Vita. What if, instead of a guy, your grandfather writes to you ??? Or a grown-up married man? Or the guy is real, but in real life he has a girlfriend, and on the network he is looking for some emotions, which, perhaps, he lacks when communicating with her. The latter option happens very often, trust me!
Until you meet in person and chat for a sufficient amount of time, you "love" only the image that you have created in your head. And because of the image, which, perhaps, is not at all who it appears to be - to commit suicide ???
Pay attention to the other, real guy. Walk, meet, communicate and maybe you will understand that your real happiness is in him.
Do not get carried away, Vita, by correspondence. This is a departure into the world of illusions, from which it is difficult to get out. And even harder. when these illusions crash against reality. And on the other side of the screen is not at all who you imagined.
Social networks are good in one case: when you know a guy in real life, but you are embarrassed to approach. Then VKontakte can come to the rescue. And in all other cases, IMHO, you shouldn't get acquainted there.
Everything will be fine!

Olga, age: 26/01/2014

Vita, good afternoon!
The image on the other side of the screen is always the unknown. Agree, before you take such a step as to step into the unknown (death) because of another unknown (the image on the social network), you need to carefully weigh everything.
So, first, will you get rid of the pain? Of course not.
The first argument is that a very small percentage of those who try to commit suicide achieve their goal. Agree, living, for example, being confined to a wheelchair is not too tempting.
The second argument is that you cannot be sure that death will bring the desired peace of mind, a kind of sleep without sleep. Research convincingly proves one thing: A person's consciousness lives with the body, but does NOT die with the body. So, instead of the desired peace, you will get an endless nightmare . Vita, did you have nightmares? Of course, you remember how bad you were in a dream and how YOU wanted to get out of there. But there is nowhere to escape from death !!! So?
The third argument. The person who wrote to you may simply be looking for entertainment. Sometimes uncles of 60 years old write to adolescents with not very good goals. you do not know what awaits you?
Excuse me, Vita, but this whole idea is clearly not worth it.
May God give you strength and good luck !!!

Moonwalker, age: 32 / 05/01/2014

Dear Vita, you should not succumb to such manipulations - 1) after all, you did not promise him anything and do not owe him anything (he is not your husband and not the ONLY person in the world who can give you what you want, believe me, I went through all this at your age ) 2) you do not know what God has prepared for you for the next turn, maybe you will meet such a loving person in real life, create a strong family and be happy. 3) who is worth your tears ??? and life ????? You don’t owe ANYONE, you are a free person, beloved child of the Gosopod, if this guy decided to take offense and delete the page - these are his problems, I’ll tell you as a guy - if a guy does this, he’s probably not himself or wants to use you, otherwise why is he trying to manipulate you so much ?????? Love - does not happen suddenly once and hit. Love is caring for a person, when you are afraid to even offend him or embarrass him, and how did he take care of you, leaving you in such a position ???? rather the opposite, so you certainly don't owe him anything !!! Vitochka remember that "love does not seek its own," so if young people talk to you about "love", you will have a good look at what can be disguised behind this word, appreciate yourself!

Pa, age: 23/01/2014

Vita, understand, you did not betray anyone! Correspondence over the network is not a relationship, especially since he is clearly not interested in constant communication and communication in real life. Does he say that he loves? Somehow it doesn't stick then ...
You thought of a lot about him, brought him closer to the ideal, and now you look at a real guy and think: "No, my ideal is better." And where he? Why not next to you? why not worried about you?
You're only 15 yet! Is it worth depriving yourself of everything that could be in your life because of an illusory relationship? After all, you yourself very correctly noted "no one will embrace, will not press to the heart, will not say affectionate words." This is true. He just plays with his and your feelings, and you are ready to give your life. This is despite the fact that even people who have lived for many years in marriage can go their separate ways. They do, yes, but they live.
Not to mention that it really may not be a nice guy, but a grandfather who decided to play love in his old age.
Real love is not like that, understand. It does not demand, play, reproach, frame. This is a light, uplifting feeling. To love means to accept, to wish for the best for a person. If your pen friend loved you, as he says, he would be there or wish you happiness with someone else. And I certainly wouldn't want you dead. You will not solve anything for her, you will just stupidly end your life. I wish you happiness and true love!

Maria, age: 25/01/2014

Vita, dear, please do not play the game "I will die, I will not die", these are not toys. You are no longer a child, you need to grow up, and understand that God gave you life as an extraordinary, sacred gift! Many people to stay alive, you know what they are doing? And mothers whose children die of cancer, ask them what is the value of human life? Have you thought about your mom? Will she have to think until the end of her life that she did something wrong, get up and go to bed every evening in insane melancholy ?! And father, everyone else? Because of some guy whom you haven't really seen or heard how they wrote correctly here who is most likely bald and fat 60 years old, or maybe it's a woman at all? By the way, my sister on classmates created a fake profile with a handsome guy, and began to write from him to her rival. And then she fell in love with this nonexistent guy. And there were even pictures, my sister pulled them from the Internet somewhere.
You are no longer a child, you are a girl, and it is time for you to understand that you cannot joke with such things as "I will die, I will not die." And you must take a responsible attitude to your life, cherish this Sacred Gift like the apple of your eye.
And then from the outside it looks like a bunch of people who have not eaten for 10 days, only drank and were terribly hungry and would be glad at least a crout of bread. And here you are standing in front of them, holding a basket with freshly baked bread, with perfectly skillfully prepared fish, and gradually throwing it all into the river in front of their eyes, and at the same time you say - “I don’t want to! I didn’t like the color of the bread, the color of my the eyes do not fit, and the fish was caught in the river at all, but I want from the ocean, so I don’t want to! "